Trust me when I say: the small stuff really matters
For many, a sign of love or affection comes neatly wrapped up with a bow— and a really large price tag. It’s bouquets of flowers, shiny diamonds and fancy dinners. It’s nice and all, and probably makes your friends jealous. It makes you happy in the moment. But what about the morning after? And the day after that?
The reality is that true happiness can never be boxed and or wrapped.
Flashy gifts can’t compare to the small, personal moments you can share with someone. A relationship built upon these gestures will be successful. Trust me when I say: the small stuff really matters in a relationship.
For example, do you:
- Make your partner a cup of tea in the morning?
- Notice when they’ve had a hard day and then make them dinner to try to bring their stress levels down?
- Bring them home little presents from time to time “just because”?
- Kiss them goodnight on the forehead?
This all sounds very obvious, doesn’t it? But so many people take their relationships for granted, assuming that as things progress these gestures are no longer necessary because their partners already know how they feel about them.
Newsflash! Even if they do know it, they still want you to show it — again and again and again. These gestures make them feel wanted, loved, and appreciated. They’re the glue that keeps your partner willingly stuck to you.
Throughout my ten year relationship with my fiancée, there have been several small things and gestures that have helped keep us together, all of which you can begin implementing today to enjoy the same success we have.
Make sure the first thing you do is something for them
When you wake up in the morning, do you first think about yourself or your partner? I get showered and packed for the day, sure, but then my attention turns to my other half. I get her breakfast sorted and leave out her lunch.
Why? Because she hates mornings, while I wake up ready to tackle the day immediately. So why not put that difference to use in our relationship? This simple gesture allows my partner to focus on herself in the morning and start the day stress free. It also increases the chances she’s going to have a good day and come home happy.
Talk to them when they get home
The best part of a relationship is companionship. Having somebody to talk with in the evenings is one of life’s simple pleasures. Don’t take this for granted. When your partner comes home, save your moans and problems for a few minutes — and start a conversation with them. It can be as simple as “hey honey, I’m glad your home. How was your day?” If you begin with a smile, a positive attitude and genuine interest in their day, it sets the right tone for the rest of the evening.
Communicate your feelings
Ask yourself, do you even tell your partner that you love them anymore? If you want to build a lasting relationship, you need to start wearing your love on your sleeve.
If you have something positive to say, get it out in the open. Seriously, what’s too lose? And when it’s returned with a similar compliment you’ll feel damn good about yourself too.
Learn to read your partner. Speak the right words at the right time. Offer the warming comfort of a cuddle when they’re down. Conveying feelings to each other is more special than spending money on material goods.
Start saying ‘we’ not ‘me’
The key to maintaining a successful relationship is being able to work together as a team. The power of partnership, which, when used correctly, can help you achieve so much in your life together.
Things become easier to deal with whenever two minds come together to act as one. By referring to yourselves as ‘we’, you change the mindset away from ‘you and me’. This simple shift brings you closer together, and gets you shooting for the same dreams.
Recognise your partner’s achievements
Now that you’ve decided to brand yourself as a team, be proud of the team’s wins! When your partner has a big win or accomplishment, let them know how happy you are for them. (You have to mean it though).
Here’s one to try — next time the two of you go out and meet people, why not start your catch up by talking about something your other half recently achieved? It’s ok to show off your partner and let them (and the world) know how proud you are of them.
Yucky couple nicknames are a must
When other people hear couple’s using nicknames, they instinctively vomit in their mouths. I get it — they are super cringe. It’s the kinda thing that puts other people off from spending time in your company.
But you know what? That’s their loss. Nicknames are a little touch that can bring about feelings of warmth, security and happiness. They are also really endearing, heartfelt and personal to the two of you.
Whether it’s an inside joke, or just something that makes them smile, find your partner a sweet moniker, and use it regularly.
Make sure the last thing you do is something for them
The last thing we do as a couple is kiss goodnight.
Why don’t you try it sometime, and see if you can go to sleep without a smile on your face?