Original Link : https://medium.com/swlh/when-your-destiny-is-distracted-and-you-are-not-looking-if-you-bump-into-love-what-do-you-do-460458ec9166

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We are now entering the season of love, senses are heightened, thoughts enlightened, energies at their most sensitive and hearts ready to make wishes.

The aim should always be to live a life full of love and laughter.

Below are my 7 tips to experience the next 5 months and any upcoming dates the best way possible:

1. Don’t buy new clothes for dates

Dates are meant to be fun, while you can enliven the event a little with your choice of attire, it’s important to feel comfortable and take your focus away from what you are wearing to how your dates energy feels. Choose pieces you already own, pieces which make you feel comfortable with a tad of sensual, light and mysterious. Choose something you won’t worry about.

Personally, I am terrible at planning outfits, I tend to wear what’s in front of me, as long as it fits and I feel comfortable in it, then it works. However, when it comes to dating, even I have moments when I wonder what to wear. When you spend too much time worrying about what you will wear, most will tend to spend even more time worrying about how they look, what their date thinks about it, and what others may be thinking. As you can imagine, those dates are the dates which will stop you from doing the most important thing when you first meet someone. Which brings me to my next point.

2. Listen

Learn to listen. You and I know, that you are amazing, have had amazing experiences, or want to have amazing experiences. You and I know, that you are the full package and have so much to share, and you want a partner who’s a good listener. The only problem is that the more you speak the more you miss out on the amazing person sitting opposite you, the more you will push the person away, the less you will learn about them and the harder it will be to be part of their life.

Allow yourself to listen, truly listen, to their story, to what excites and motivates them, listen to their goals, listen to what they say they are looking for and listen when they tell you how they see life. While listening, pay attention to their body language, to their facial features, allow yourself to feel their energy, and pay attention to how much they are willing to share. If they are not speaking much, start by asking questions, be excited to learn about them, by learning you will be able to decide if you want to be part of their story, and if they will excel in yours.

Don’t hold on to someone simply because they look and smell good, because they are nice to you, listen so that you can analyse if you can add to their happiness, peace, love, and if they will be able to add to yours. Listen, so that you can figure out, if you two complement each other.

If the person opposite you, is the one for you, you will have many opportunities to share all the amazing exciting things flowing in your head.

Train yourself by listening to what your friends have to say when you are together, try not to interrupt them, listen until they ask you a question. Sometimes you don’t know what your friends are going through, because you don’t listen, if you can’t listen then you won’t know what to ask.

Try it work, listen to those around you, learn about them, pay attention to how they work, it will help you open up your mind to different ways of learning and of doing the same tasks.

Does this sound like a lot of work? Then….

3. Make time for what makes you laugh

Write a list of what makes you laugh and do them. Do them often. I love stand-up comedy, for this reason I have started to go to a few more events and watching online. It helps me feel invigorated. I also enjoy spending time socialising, luckily my close friends all have great sense of humour.

Don’t be afraid to feel and be childish, a young mind stimulates you in more ways than forcing yourself to be serious 24/7. Let yourself be and enjoy a good joke.

Know the difference between healthy sense of humour, and destructive sense of humour. Anything that demeans, devalues, and makes you question yourself, will drain your energy. No matter how healthy you may be externally, if you tarnish your insides it will affect your overall health.

4. Focus on your health from inside

From eating healthily, exercising and sleeping, make sure you feed your brain with knowledge. Try to read at least one book per week. Start with topics you’re interested in, then move on to the less exciting topics but good to know. Try to diversify your choices at least twice per month.

To improve your brain health, practice mindfulness, live in the moment. The best way is to include meditation as part of your daily routine.

5. Learn something new

If reading is more than a hobby for you, then try challenge yourself a little more and learn a new recipe, musical instrument, language or a new dance.

6. Get moving

Make time to move your body in a different way at least once a week, the more you move the more in control you will be and the more confident you will feel.

7. Date yourself

o Find clothes that make you feel comfortable yet your most beautiful

o Make time to groom yourself for you, looking your best will make you feel your best

o Don’t wait for a date to worry about body hairs, if you’re at your most comfortable with hair on your legs don’t let a date make you feel any less, if you’re more comfortable waxed / shaved/ lasered / plucked then do it regularly for you

o How do you feel about your nails, head hairs and scents? Make time to look after your hair, your nails, to look for body sprays, creams and perfumes — make time to seduce yourself

o Don’t wait for a date, to worry about scars, if you have them and want to minimise their appearance start looking for ways to do it, if you’ve accepted them as part of you, embrace and cherish them. Whoever is meant to love you, they will love every inch of you.

Simply put, unless you love yourself, you cannot love another.