Original Link : https://medium.com/@crystaljackson/calling-back-the-power-we-gave-away-484514a94f85

“I call all of my power back to me now. I am whole and complete.”
-Danielle LaPorte

I’ve been thinking about all the power I’ve given away over the years. I’ve given it up for so many reasons. For love. For grief. For fear. I have allowed myself to be powerless, afraid to own my power because it meant I would have to make tough decisions. I’ve felt it drain away from me, allowing other people’s narratives to control my life.

I can give so many examples of this. There are the employers we have who think they can control us outside of work as well as within. There are lovers who manipulate and harm, slowly stripping us of our power in the name of love. There are the opinions and influences that we allow to matter more than our own authentic selves. In each instance, we give away our power, often thinking we have little choice.

Today, I call it all back- every last ounce of power that I gave away. I call it back because I need it, in my strength now more than ever. I need it because it is mine. It belongs to me. Anyone who held power over me, no matter how small, held it with my consent. I may have given it unwillingly or in ignorance, but I still gave it up. Now I take it back.

Calling back our power is necessary for our personal growth. At a certain point, we need to reclaim our full power. We need to understand our value and our strength. Too often, we allow ourselves to be depleted. Our energy is drained by the physical and emotional effort of living. We don’t spend nearly enough time recharging, and it leaves us off-balance and exhausted.

Calling our power back might mean that we let go of the attachments that no longer serve us. We can learn to forgive, letting go of grudges and hard feelings. We can let go of the relationships in our lives that are no longer beneficial, choosing to focus on those who invest in us as much as we invest in them. We can find a way to forgive ourselves for our own missteps and mistakes, choosing to accept that we did the best we could at the time.

Recalling our power may also mean investing in our own self-care. Our energy will naturally be depleted sometimes, but when we make self-care a priority, we’re able to deal with the up and down nature of life. To come into our own power, it’s necessary that we make things like meditation and even exercise non-optional parts of our lives. It means that we take care of our bodies, being careful not to abuse them with an excess of unhealthy food or substances.

While I don’t recommend abstinence from pleasurable foods or alcohol, I do recommend balance and restraint. Our bodies are temples, and we need to be mindful of what we put into them. This includes taking a mindful look at where products we use come from and how ethically they are sourced. It all goes in to owning our power.

One of the more difficult parts of reclaiming our power is taking it back in those areas where we willingly gave it away. Love is the perfect example. I once fell in love with someone who didn’t love me back. I gave up a lot of power, and I did it willingly. I won’t regret the love. I can’t.

Recalling my power doesn’t mean I love this person less. It means that I love myself enough to no longer invest the energy in a love that’s not returned. I can acknowledge it the way I would an errant thought during meditation- without judgment and without holding on to it.

When we figure out that it’s not selfish to belong wholly and completely to ourselves, we’re more able to have healthy relationships with ourselves and others. We’re more able to be authentically ourselves without apology or feeling a need to hide away. I think it also makes us more accepting of others, understanding that the journey of growth is not a linear one. Nor is it uncomplicated.

When we’re full in our own power, we also don’t feel the need to take away anyone else’s. We understand that supporting and empowering others only adds to our own power and doesn’t deplete it. It’s how we come to support human rights, understanding that equality will never take away from our own rights. It’s how we’re able to acknowledge issues of privilege or talk about subjects we might be otherwise too uncomfortable to address head on. When we’re full in our own power, we can listen to understand rather than to defend, and we can take valid criticism to heart and let it make us better.

Calling back our own power isn’t a magic spell with an instant magical impact. But it matters that we learn how to be wholly ourselves, filled with the full power of our love and other gifts. It’s important that we come to a place where we no longer give all of our personal power away in order to make life easier instead of better. Our whole lives will be filled with challenges, and we can face them better when we allow ourselves to be complete, rather than seeing ourselves as less than or broken.

Because we are enough. We are complete. We are incredibly powerful, if only we’ll own it.